A Blast from the Past.

Sometimes I imagine what it would be like to bring someone like George Washington back to life and drive him around in the year 2007. It doesn't have to be GW. He's just the one I think of. It's a way of giving me some distance and perspective about the world and society and culture and who we are.

After I showed him his picture on the dollar bill and quarter, what would he think? Beyond the modern world of cars and appliances and computers and subways and airplanes, industry, skyscrapers, clothes and pre-packaged food and pharmaceuticals - beyond all that, what would he think of what we pay attention to? Especially this week. Anna Nicole Smith's body is decomposing yet she can't be buried because estranged family members, people who are claiming to be family members, people who are claiming paternity and a kooky "everybody look at me" judge won't put her in the ground because it might take away from their 15 minutes of infamy. Britney Spears shaved her head and suddenly everyone is a psychoanalyst and has labeled her everything from confused to suicidal. Season 6 of American Idol has no discernible talent to offer among its contestants so it has to create some "drama" between Ryan and Simon to keep viewers coming back.

Simon: "Sweetheart."

Ryan: "Don't call me sweetheart. We don't have that kind of relationship."

Everybody all together now: "Oooooooooooh."
Even I can't believe this exchange took place in front of 30 million people. What would poor George make of all this?

What did people do for fun in the mid 1700's? Would the father of our country think televison is fun in any way, shape or form? I'm thinking not. I imagine that after less than five minutes in the year 2007, Washington's ears would start to bleed. So would his eyes, his nose, his mouth and any other opening into or out of his body. I further imagine that his eyes would be darting around frantically in search of a trusty steed to remove him from this modern day Hell on Earth.

All I can say is, thank goodness the VanHalen reunion tour isn't going to happen. How could I begin to explain the David Lee Roth/Eddie VanHalen dynamic. Talk about a far cry from a minuet.